It’s been a couple years since I’ve put any real thoughts down on paper, or anywhere, for that matter. When you live with your best friend and near a bunch of great friends, communication is instantaneous. What heart felt and thoughts had; all that needs to be said gets said. There’s really not much left to write down. I bemoan the complete loss of my internal dialogue D:
Last week was the close of my second year at the university, with one of the busiest and most interesting school quarters that I’ve had yet. I’ve never been so distracted-had way too many things happening and barely had enough time for anything other than keeping up with my schedule. My focus was split so much I couldn’t even remember things without physically writing them down in a little Moleskine. I mean, it was a great three months and all but CHRIST, I would have liked the same amount of productivity minus the stress & exhaustion…with a lot more food and a bit more sleep. My stomach thinks college fucking sucks, because food falls pretty low on my priority scale. That needs to change, like NOW.
College so far, has been this crazy balancing act between work (jobs/internships/school) & play (socializing/”me”-time). I am two opposing armies: the Clare that wants to build a foundation for achieving long-term career goals, who needs to focus on getting her fucking work done [go study, bitch!] and the Clare that loves to watch the hours fly by relaxing at home [fuck work!] or by going out to feed the social beast in her that wants to be in constant interaction with people. It’s a battle, because in satisfying one side, I seriously neglect the other.
So. I’m past the point of various crossroads and I’m waiting to see the results of all these decisions that I’ve made. This is me, making an odd sort of comeback to the world of weblogs: the pre-moving-out-of-town, post-sophomore-year, I’m-starting-to-feel-really-old me that’s enjoying the good life. And yes, I’m going to blog about random shit whenever I feel like it.